anchoridge

so just a quick update 

ive been sick for the past i think week and its horrible but im better ish now my voice is still crap so i sound like a man and its hilarious

lots of art stuff coming up actually my art teacher specifically asked me to enter this contest and she said i would be likely to place there. yeah and im so happy she said that to me

ive fallen back into bad habits :/ but they've inspired me to draw so i have a lot of drawings to post, some im deciding whether or not to post because they're psychotic almost demonic, very gorey stuff that was created when in a bad state of mind, but its hella rad so i really wanna show people  
oh well

so ya
 

What's your real name?
Abi

How tall are you?
5'9

What's your natural hair color?
strawberry blonde i think

What's your eye color?
greeeen

What's your orientation?

i dont think this matters

Are you single, taken or undecided?
Single pringle and ready to mingle
i am talking to people tho 

What do you do in your spare time?
lay around

What's your job or occupation?
while im in school im not allowed to get a job

What do you like about yourself?
my eyes skin and hair

What do you dislike about yourself?

im very self conscious about my scars 

What did your friends notice about you when they first met you?
probably something with a joke i said or something to do with the people i hang out with 

What is your belief/religion if you believe in anything at all?
i do not choose to disclose this 

Do you drink?
umm

Do you smoke?
ehh

What are your major fears?
not being accepted, drowning, getting hit by a car from the side 

Do you have any dreams or goals?
id love to become an actor

Have you ever had a crush or an ex?
lots of crushes and yes 

Who's your best buddys?
tyler christian and crystal 

What's your favorite dish?
i love kedgeree 

What's your favorite drink?

lemonade and hot coco 

What's your favorite color?
green 

If you had a super power, what would it be?
to be able to stop time (but like never age when i did it)

What's your favorite movie?

silver linings playbook 

What's your least favorite food?
curry 

What's the last meal you want before you die?
a nice soup 

What do you drive and what would you really like to drive?
no my parents wont let me(my grades are shit) but id love to drive my dads car its amazing and gahhhh

What is your most disliked bug?
roaches

What pet peeves do you dislike the most?
hating on people and chewing/breathing  loudly

What do you dislike in life?
not knowing what will happen when i die 

this movie hit me in the honey nut feelios 

r    schools back now and its really hard, i mean im passing all my classes but its taking a lot of work not like it bothers me though. its not the academics that are hard its the people and other things, so much drama, and i mean i have a specific group of friends, i have to act fake and bitchy when im with them, its not like i care either theyre good people deep down and i see that in them, just when youre around others you have to act like youre back on the top. 
then ive got my dad asking me about college, i understand where he's coming from though, its my junior year and i have to take the SAT and tour universities. he keeps asking me what i want to do and i just dont know, i cant imagine myself doing anything, maybe there is no future for me, but ill probably end up at Rice or Baylor studying something i could care less about, then go fill out a paper so people can judge me and give me a job that i get to do for the rest of my life. im not ready to make that big of a decision, but i guess i have to right? i just want what i do to matter, so that i know i was important.
the days feel like theyre just stringing together, im so tired, my depression is starting to do the thing and im not looking forward to when it starts to get really bad. like it does this thing where it just goes down and down and down, when its down at its lowest ill get home go to my room and completely break down, i get really sensitive like ill be pouring a glass of water and some will spill down the side of the glass or miss the glass entirely and ill just start crying. its not fun. im already starting to lose interest in stuff and i could care less about talking to people cant forget about insomnia amiright. but i know its doing the thing so i cant really help it.
whatever happens this year i just hope i dont get lost along the way